TastyRetroGaming

AEW fight forever

I’ll first off by saying I am a big wrestling fan, if that hasn’t become apparent over my previous posts. I watch WWE, AEW and try to keep up some what with ROH, impact and even some of what goes on over in NJPW. It’s hard getting to fit what seems a 100 hours of wrestling in a week as is with having a new wrestling game to play. Having already got WWE 2k23 on PS5 which I should probably get round to reviewing at some point. I opted to buy this on the Switch as there isn’t many options for wrestling on it.

I’m not normally so on it with reviews in the sense I’m normally about half a year behind. This time though having the portable aspects coming in handy. As I’m currently on holiday enjoying the sun and drinking from 11 in morning at my all inclusive hotel. During the flight here and in the later hours of the day I’ve actually played a substantial amount of this game.

There’s a lot to like about it. Obviously at this point in the switch’s life with its hardware it’s not as pretty as the big boy console version. Mostly it handles what I’d assume to be the same. Load times aren’t that bad and you can mostly get through a match with very few to no problems. The frames do stutter from time to time, or if you go to pick an object up you will go through it or the game is trying to achieve a body horror element to it. The game doesn’t look too bad though. A bit rough around the edges and for some reason in handheld mode sometimes when you’ve elected your wrestler their image goes this wider shitty PS2 level image, that really doesn’t do the graphics any justice. It’s super fuzzy for no reason. Overall the models are a bit more arcade like, but that’s clearly the aesthetic it’s going for.

The controls are simple, three buttons for attack and mixing them up achieves varying combos. You can grapple and Irish whip producing more moves. You can do attacks from the apron, the corners and jump over the ropes. It’s fairly similar to the later 2k games for WWE. It even shares in where you attack/grapple from will produce different moves or submissions. Front facing, from behind and off the mat etc. Not to mention the silly amount of usable weapons which cause an excessive amount of blood. The matches aren’t designed to go on for long, again adding to the arcade experience here. You have health but you don’t necessarily see that as everything runs off a momentum bar. This increase every move or taunt until you can trigger a signature move. Then you can taunt to upgrade it to a finisher. Which once both have been hit you’ll pretty much get a pin.

A few of the road to elite activities you can do. Eating, visiting famous landmarks. Going to hospital if you are injured.

You can chain wrestle by trying to guess the opposite sort of move your opponent will trigger until one eventually is wrong and gains the upper hand. You have to button mash to submit or get out of a pin. So again nothing too difficult to do and centred around the same 4 main buttons of steak and grab.

You can create your own wrestler, with their own move set. With every match either exhibition or from triad to the elite you gain money from the match rating. Plus your daily challenges you complete. This money allows to unlock new characters, skins, arena parts, entrances and moves. It’s fairly in depth and again not too dissimilar to WWE 2k23.

If you do a customer wrestler run, you have to buy upgrades to make your character better. As an existing one is locked into place.

There isn’t much in the way of different match types to wrestle which really is something that lets the game down. It’s something that 2k23 does very well. It aids in the fun being able to play all your favourite match types, which for me is a steel cage/hell in cell match you just can’t go wrong with that. It’s also lacking in a fully realised roster, I mean this could be due to how long it’s been in development and who’s come/gone and become more popular. There is glaring omissions though, and unless their is going to be more DLC added or a few free updates it’s not gonna change all that much.

Match rating you get after winning or losing. Not sure how it works tbh. Get money and if you achieve any of the challenges.

Road to the elite is fun, it’s separated into 4 month of show blocks leading to the four main PPV. You can use pre existing wrestler or your own custom one. Each month block has branching routes so you can have different feuds and outcomes. Even taking a pin changes the outcome. It can stop you from winning the title. I went first time round with the American Dragon Bryan Danielson, one of my all time favourites. Namely just as he always elegantly puts, ‘I’m going to kick his fucking head in’. Naturally I won all but 1 match. The one I lost is where death triangle gang fucked me in a lights out match . The multi man matches sometimes go full clusterfuck and not in a good way.

The casino royale mode is odd as only 4 people in one go will ever be in a ring so you don’t get h to e full experience as you do in the royal rumble mode, over in WWE. Strangely as well in road to the elite you have gauntlet matches but they aren’t an option to play in exhibition. What you do get though is many more mini games. Every week in road to the elite you fly to a new city, where it ends with a match but you also can wrestle on dark/rampage prior. As you have to keep motivation health and stamina up. You do this by going for food , where it’s suspiciously the same table at every restaurant. Go site seeing, go gym, recuperate at hospital if you get injured. In these you can run into a bother wrestler for a sneaky picture for the album, or if in a feud. Anna hay during a press conference power bombed me through a table setting up a PPV match with her and Christian Cage. These mini games are also an option to win more money and skill points, to unlock new moves for your custom character. From quick memory games, general knowledge quizzes, following dance moves, running from one end of a stadium to the other without hitting a hidden hole etc. You can play these at your leisure as well unlocking more every time you finish road to the elite. Strangely these features give me Yakuza vibes in a good way. I think they are a nice touch but I’d have preferred a deeper pool of match options even if the exploding Barb wire death match is an option. And I’d say that is definitely is the top math type to go for .

One of the mini games you can do, and the odd choice of casino royale, where only 4 people are in the ring at anyone go.

I really like the combat in this game and that it’s not that stat geared so every one is equal. Along with making the matches be quick rounds, like old school mortal kombat, street fighter and the likes. I mean I’m not that fussy about graphics, so I don’t think it looks to bad, I appreciate the lack of entrances as well as I always turn them off to get straight into the action. However the bit walking down the ramp if you press the attack options you can trigger pyro and stuff. It even has hidden unlockable characters, Owen Hart, Paul White and Mr Brodie Lee. Something most games no longer do.

The three stages of pain in the exploding Barb wire death match. Easily my favourite match type.

Overall I’d rate this game a 7/10 positively Tasty. Which admittedly wasn’t as high as I’d like to rate it. The gameplay and combat is fantastic, quick, fun and easy to get the hang off. I should mention reversal is an option but doesn’t tend to work. It does need more match variety, that is something that is clearly lacking. More wrestlers wouldn’t go amiss either. If you’re wrestling fan or just like combat games, this is worth while but it’s definitely a game that’ll need to grow or if a sequel happens improve upon.

There will be a V.2 of this post once I’m done soaking up the sun and drinking and eating far more then my girthy body should be having. I’ll add a bit more content as well as som pics and vids of gameplay. Sprucing the goose a tad as it were.

Released 29th June 2023, Nintendo Switch.

The Callisto Protocol

I was quite interested in this game from when it was first showcased. The game was directed by the co-creator of the original dead space game so finally having a new full linear horror game series on the new gen consoles was right up my alley. Even if a remake of dead space dropped like 2 months later, which I haven’t picked up yet at some point I probably will give that a bash. As it was very well reviewed across the board. Something that this game wasn’t, it seemed to get 6’s and 7’s which isn’t bad by any stretch. So when going into this game I was unsure how it’d go.

The first thing to note is the games graphics are great, having the main character Jacob Lee mo-capped and voiced by actor Josh Duhamel. The army dude from the first three transformer films. As well as Dani Nakamura played by Karen Fukuhara who is Kimiko in the boys and the bad guy of the game Captain Ferris portrayed by Sam Witwer, who for me is notable Starkiller in the force unleashed games. They all look top notch, honestly no complaints on that front if that’s a thing you rate highly in your gaming life. The game takes place in an infected and over run prison called Black iron on one of the moons of Jupiter. I’ll try to keep this review light on the spoilers, but seem will inevitable slip through the cracks.

Your inventory adn collected weapons, not much too see.

It’s a short game, taking me about 11 hours to complete, I think. The game is split into 8 chapters that naturally role into one another, progressing the story. Now with the game being as linear as it is, it means traversing the bowels of the prison, the nuked colony underground it was built on, and the blizzard ridden snow fields briefly. All of it looks fantastic in design, and when it’s dark I found myself having to walk round with my gun ready and primed as it gave you more of a flash light. All of it aids in the ambience and feel of a treacherous horror film. The enemies all look disturbing enough and distinct to know which variety you are facing. Now their could’ve been a few more just variety as by chapter 5 you’ve basically seen every enemy type. Including the dirty stomach tentacle fuckers, that if you don’t shoot immediately they mutate and become bigger bastards to kill. Being set in the future, and out in space it’s very sci-fi laden design which also appeals to my tastes. So from this perspective it’s a visually impressive game in design and styling. It fits the story very well. Even if that story could’ve used probably 2 chapters more just to flesh it out a bit more and make Captain Ferris that more of a bad guy.

Using one of the many wall impliments to impale your foes upon with the GRP function.

Now combat in this game is limited and fairly basic. You get your stun baton which is used for melee, then there are 5 guns you get schematics for. Now you can only dodge by flicking your right stick left and then right, cause if you do the same direction twice you will get twatted out. So make sure you use that 1-2-1 pattern for optimum dodging. Now I only used three guns, I didn’t bother wasting credits on the other two and honestly the hand-cannon, the riot shotgun and assault rifle did me a solid. You don’t have any unlockable skills or extra defence, so learning to dodge early on is key, and it’s a bit wank to be honest. I like the simplicity of it, but some buffs, or specific upgrades wouldn’t have gone amiss. As you wonder around you come across printers where you can print weapons, attachments, health injectors and ammo. The only other item you get is the GRP, where you can suspend enemies and fling them around. On the weaker ones slamming them into blades, or spiked walls is a blessing sometimes. Or shooting the exploding enemies or red canisters help out a lot as well. You get credits by curb stomping the ever loving fuck out of defeated enemies, inflicting further maiming upon the dead. Some are laying around like extra health which become sparser as chapters go on, from crushed boxes or selling certain types of items which are all they are good for. Now the upgrades ain’t cheap especially on the assault rifle which you get in chapter 7. However I used that two thirds upgraded to rinse of the final boss, and it would be better if it wasn’t locked into burst fire. You’re hand-cannon though go for top upgrades on that and the damage on the stun baton. This will make your life far easier.

Oddly there are only really two bosses in this game a two-head which you fight four different ones I think it is, and Captain Ferris. As with the other enemies there is a healthy helping of body horror, and the whole facility is spread in blood and viscera. As well as guards in various states of mangled in most rooms. The gore in this game is heavy and might not be for everyone, and Jacob is no exception, with most of his death animation involving getting his head exploded or lopped in half, or if you are really lucky he might lose an arm. From the body horror and gratuitous violence, you get typical jump scares, you get constantly jumped from behind or some shit launching at you from around corner. For the most part it’s fairly standard and I think they could’ve amped it up a tad more. Another feature of this game is stealth kills, which again aren’t great, you crouch get behind them and stab them if the option flashes. This doesn’t work on most enemies as they clock you immediately and will run over to bitch slap you in the chops. You are also limited on carry capacity for half the game and it’s a bit bollocks, even once you get the suit which increases your health and carry capacity. It quickly becomes full of ammo, and I found I need a lot of health injectors which seemingly just stop being around for pick ups once you hit chapter 5. Where the enemies also die the same but for some reason begin to inflict a lot more damage, and with the slightly shit dodge system. When you are surrounded and killed off one enemy the next will pretty much just fuck you up before you can re-act. The two heads and Ferris will pretty much one shot you regardless of difficulty as well.

Some top tier gameplay of the combat and dodge functions, whereI 100% to flump it.

I did enjoy the story as for the first few chapters it builds the world and the circumstances around what was going on more with little droplets of why all the inmates suddenly mutated and began eating the survivors. Then the last two chapters kinda just dump everything else on you, and this is where the extra chapter or so could’ve really been used. As a few more characters are introduced and conveniently have the answers you need.

I did really enjoy the game for what it’s worth. The length of the game does come with the perks of playing it on the other difficulty options you have, each harder then the last with a permadeath option if you hate yourself that much to go for it. The game has since launch has added in a few improvements from what I’ve read, as well as the DLC adding new modes. The wave based riot mode, and the story DLC is dropping in a couple days, which I will actually be getting as the game does end on a cliffhanger. This all comes with new weapons, death/kill animations a different suit, so as far as season pass goes it’s not the worst going.

Some light stealth kills, doesn’t expand any further than this.

I think this game is a solid 7/10 Positively Tasty. Which falls squarely in line with what a lot of other reviewers gave this game. I think there was a good story there which could’ve been a tad longer, a bit of an upgrade system for melee combat and dodging/blocking. As you can improve damage output but ultimately is very limited and not as fluid as it should be. Maybe a small skill tree could be implemented if a second game comes, just spice things up a bit. For a new IP, it’s a strong start, everything done here needs to just be finessed and built upon. More exploration is needed as there isn’t much to look for outside the main path you have to follow and a few more enemies and a bit more weapon variety. If you like horror or the original dead space games I would recommend giving this a go still. It’s mostly enjoyable and easy to get into.

Released 2nd December 2022, Sony Playstation 5.

Jedi Survivor

I’ll start this by stating that I am a massive Star Wars nerd, I’ve got far too many lego Star Wars models, too many books and comics and I’ve started my Star Wars tattoo sleeve, so I’m hoping that I’m not going to be too biased just because this is a game based on my favourite galaxy far far away. That being said, on the other end I’ve had bad experience with games from EA, Star Wars battlefront 2, although great a year later was a shambles when it released. This game unfortunately has a similar problem.

I picked this up about 5 days after release while shopping for my kids and decided I also deserved a gift. I fired it up and was instantly blown away by the beauty, new brutality and the story. While being as spoiler free as possible, this game starts with your classic tutorial section showcasing the new abilities while reminding you of the abilities from the first game. One thing to mention on this is that you don’t re-learn old things, it’s all brand new stuff and I really appreciate this. It’s much better than your character forgetting everything from before and having to re unlock abilities, and learning more advanced versions instead makes more lore based sense, with cal Learning these new moves and developing as a Jedi knight. This leads into your first boss fight and shows just how far Cal has come in the last 5 years. You fight an enemy from the previous game that was a fairly difficult boss fight, in this game however Cal absolutely destroys them. This is all great story telling and shows more character development that the entire sequel trilogy ( I had to get one in).

I wont talk too much more about story because I don’t want to spoil anything but it’s spectacular, it’s even a better story than Fallen Order which I really enjoyed. It’s around 20 hours long which isn’t to shabby and if you go for platinum like me, your looking 50-60 which isn’t too bad. I will admit that although Jedda and Koboh are massive maps and are brilliantly fleshed out, that I would have liked a few more planets. You get these 2 Hub worlds, 2 decent little planets, 1 small space station and another planet with no collectibles.
I’d have added maybe 2 more medium size worlds to fill in the gaps, maybe Jakku to tie into the new trilogy and something like Felucia to show off the bright colour range in glorious 4k.

Speaking of 4k, this game is beautiful, all the locations look great, the characters look great and so do the lightsabers. This game gives you 9 different colours in the base game and an extra one on new game plus, as well as 5 stances. Double bladed and Crossguard were my go to, double is great for defence from blasters and crowd control while Cross guard was slow but powerful, your classic two handed weapon. Limb dismembered is accurate and with the occasional decapitation this feels more accurate and brutal than the first game.

Now unfortunately we get on to the bad bits and, there’s only really one, but it is a big problem. The frame rate during most of the game is fine and it all flows, but try and fight some storms troopers in a stream and it’s all over. I’m not sure you get much over 2 fps and combat slows to a grinding halt. This also happens during some of the faster cutscenes, some of which would be spectacular if it wasn’t for dropping you out of the immersive experience. This said, it may have improved through more recent updates, which I hope it does because this game is a contender for GOTY even with these issues.

Another mention for issues I had were centred around hammy controls when it came to using the force on certain puzzles. There was a part where I could see a force echo ripe for the reaping and could see how to get there, but couldn’t because instead of force pulling platforms, it decided to do some heavy attack and launch me into the abyss. After this happening several times I abandoned it, but after an update I went back later in the game and it worked immediately so I can only presume the update fixed the problem.

Overall I fully enjoyed this game and would rate it 10/10 if it wasn’t for those problems. So with consideration I’d give this game 8/10, a highly tasty game. This is hard for me, as I said I’m a Star Wars fan and wanted to give it higher but they are real issues. I’d also have liked it to be a bit longer (I’ve heard that before), but I can’t rate it down too much for this because those hub worlds are rather large.

Review by MoonHead.

Released 28th April, Sony PlayStation 5

Fifa 15 – PS Vita, a quick take review.

This will just be a quick review, this is due to the usual not being able to get any footage and as for what this game is I doubt I really need it. Finding this PS Vita version for super cheap, naturally thought I might as well get it and give it a go. It also gets me a few cheeky trophies to add to my list.

You’d be surprised to find out I actually don’t really give two shits about football, I used to care many years back but have since not really bothered with it. I’ll still watch it if it’s on or when the world cup or euros happen. So getting this game simply comes to the previously mentioned cheapness.

I think the last proper fifa game I played would be way back in 2011 or maybe 2012 on the PS3. So my ability in comparing this to the full version console of the same year, too even the newer ones is very limited. Graphically it’s so, so. Not too bad, the footballers all look fairly different and have some likeness to those I know. The pitch looks passable, and every stadium for each team definitely differ from one another. With enough effort also going into the home, away and third kits for each team. I don’t think this handheld version has the same amount of licensed teams as the full big boy console version. I suppose though having the privilege of the same functions and gameplay on the go, this isn’t much of a sacrifice.

The game has several different modes, standard exhibition, create a pro, tournaments and the manager mode. Tournament modes pretty standard pick a club and a trophy you want to win and the game sets up the tournament. Which if you want you can simulate the matches so you don’t actually play it. Beating Man City as 1 star rated Accrington for the FA cup just feels right for some reason. I’d be lying if I said I had done the management mode yet, I haven’t and as it stands I probably wont either. I enjoy play quick 5 min half for the most part or if im in the mood just going for a random team and blitzing through a tournament. I did this with Barcelona a few times when I had my create pro as the centre forward racking up 35 goals over the course of the tournament. Doing feats whilst playing games or in the arena prior to the match aids in making your create a pro stats better. So for the most part it’s kinda pointless but I can see it adds a little something extra to a match if you waned to do it.

The one feature this handheld has over the main consoles version is that if you want you can make use of the touchscreen or rear touch pad. The rear touchpad function is more cumbersome then useful and I turned it off pretty much straight away, any accidental touch just cause the played at the time to just go for broke and spanner the ball into the aether. This could just be down to my big gangly hands, but for the most part using the touchscreen is more efficient and useful to you. You can use it for plays, to make more precise through or lob passes, as well as for scoring attempts. However I did have to disable this feature three tournies deep as for some reason my game glitched the fuck out and every time my player got a touch the hoofed the fucking ball straight down pitch or clearing it into a never ending streams of corners, I got to 13 in a row before I started to think my beloved vita screen was dying. I even tried a few other games to make sure a button wasn’t stuck. But turning that off seemed to fix it, which is a shame as I did like the hybrid control system.

I’d go into a bit more about the game but ultimately if you’ve played any version of Fifa, you’ve played it. Fundamentally it’s a football game, the only difference comes down to graphics, modes and maybe the amount of trophies you can win or teams you can play as. The main controls centre around running, passing, with the basic alternates, and shooting. This version has more precise shot options or finesse you may call it. You can lob the keeper, pull of feints, do some fancy footwork which usually fails on my part. So if you like you can put a tad more flair into the game. The A.I doesn’t seem overly hard, you can tell the difference between bottom teams and top teams. This won’t stop you smashing big clubs 10 -1 though. The pitches reflect weather and different times of the day, but don’t expect much effort in that department it’s not overly detailed.

I’d give this a 7/10 Positively Tasty. This is surprising as much to me as it may be to you. It’s not the best looking game nor something I really care about. However over the past few weeks I have found myself wanting to play it. From quick 5 mins half’s to the occasional full 20 min option. Even going as far as knocking off some of the assists to make the game feel more challenging. All the while whilst I am playing Tears of the Kingdom, and that game is an 11/10 full masterpiece. It’s quick, portable fun and low cost effort, you probably won’t lose and even if you do it don’t mean shit. However if you are like me and like my old consoles as much as my new ones, this as a football fan would be worth your time.

Released 26th September 2014, Sony PS Vita.

More backlog.

I choose to believe I am the bane of my own existence. Nothing more epitomises this then my sickening need to keep buying games, from all consoles of every generation at any given time. I especially can’t help myself if they are cheap as shit. I fucking love a good bargain, I mean who doesn’t. It’s truly one of lifes great delights, it’s up there with scotch eggs and pro wrestling. I’m a strange fellow alright.

As you can see a strange collection this time round, and being second hand some of the cases look only slightly fucked. A pleasnt bonus.

As you can see from the latest treasure trove of shite i’ve collected, I have even somehow managed to buy the same game for two different consoles a small faux pas, one might say. I mean to be fair to me it cost like £4 for both of them so who gives a shit. I even bought a fifa game, and i couldn’t care less about football. Has it stopped me playing it a lot over the past few nights, sure hasn’t. Could a quick take review be on the horizon for this title, oh you know it is.

I am definetly most exicted about this bad boy though.

I know what you’re thinking this completely straight picture of the case is almost of professional quality.

Finally having attained every mainline Professor Layton game, as for some reason this one is harder to come by and cost 5 times the amount. But, alas it is now within my firm grips to live as one of the many hundred games I will most definetly get too later. On the plus, the only one I have left to get now is the strange crossover title for the 3DS, Professor Layton vs Phoenix Wright. Which unless i’m super fortunate to run across it in the wild for a fiver, I won’t be purchasing anytime soon as it costs a small fortune. One day I won’t be poor as shit and I’ll be able to treat myself to these expensive treasures.

At some point in the near future I will be updating this site, giving it a well earned spruce. Making it more appeasing to the masses. So as well as the steady stream of reviews, expect an even steadier stream of slow changes upon this website. Expect more chapters in the ever expanding gospel of Tasty , but until next time my faithful readers. Stay fuckin’ Tasty.

Super Mario 3D Land

Am I writing a game review of a Mario game on the back of the Super Mario Bros movie, yes i am. Which honestly isn’t a bad film and it’s grossed over 1 billion, pretty much everyone has seen it at this point. Also i’m writing this because I found it for a few quid and in between everything else I have to do with life this is a quick, easy and fun game to play. Having been unable to play much as of late, having my end of year assignments to do, now they are out of the way, I can finally move onto bigger and better things. Firstly this, then secondly and obviously Zelda Tears of the Kingdom. I will also be attempting to play the mid levelled reviewed, The Callisto Protocol, whilst I have a few months to myself I really aught to work through my obscene backlog of games, which only gets worse. With the addition of AEW fight forever finally being released the end of next month, plus Final Fantasy 16 dropping, it seems I’m doomed to be swallowed and consumed by my own greed of collecting games and struggling to get anything played. I haven’t even got the platinum for Hogwarts Legacy still, and I’ve basically done everything outside of collecting all the collectibles in Hogwarts itself and replaying the other houses at the start of the game.

Anyhow, enough of my gaming woes, which ultimately are highly trivial in the grand scheme of life. To the meaty part of this review, the game itself. If you’ve ever played a Mario game, you’ll know what’s in store for you here. It’s your typical story Bowser takes Peach. Mario gets outraged and goes around jumping on stuff until he finally beats him again, and gets reunited with the Princess. At this point in time with the series itself being around 30 years old, you’d have decided whether or not you like Mario games, as they all tend to follow the same formula. Not a bad thing mind, or it could be you just really enjoy Mario Kart as any sane person does.

You traverse through 8 different worlds. Within each of these worlds are your playable levels. Each level puts Mario in a different environment with different obstacles to traverse and enemies to get past. This games level creativity are superb. Each mission is genuinely different, considering at the basic concept it’s reach the flag pole at the end of the level whilst collecting coins, and finding the three hidden star medals in each level and jumping on some Koopas to smush it. Once you’ve completed the main worlds, you unlock Luigi as a playable character. Allowing you to go through the worlds again as the small plumbers brother. Not really affecting the gameplay any. You do unlock a few extra bonus worlds though, so you can at least attempt those first time round as the green counterpart.

Throughout this game you’ll come across the usual power-ups, and transformations. These include small and super Mario, plus fire, Tanooki and and boomerang if you get those ability power ups instead. Plus a few other smaller ones, like invincible Mario if you keep doing, the 1up health as well. There’s enough to help you traverse these mini biomes, a few extra wouldn’t have hurt though, just to spice up the game variety a little bit more.

As a game, much like Tearaway on the PS Vita, this is one of those titles that truly utilises the hardware and capabilities of the console it’s on. Making full use of the 3D,making use of it in level, and making for some of the mini-games where sliding it on or off reveals how to solve the puzzle before you. Even the gyroscopic functionality is used for firing canons, binoculars and a few other things.

This game is deserving of a big and beefy 8/10, A highly tasty game. It’s the epitome of quick bite-sized fun. Each mission is quick and different enough from the last to keep you entertained, whether in quick bursts or longer gaming sessions. It has great re-playability and like most Mario games, just plain and simple fun.

Released November 18^th 2011, Nintendo 3DS

Resident Evil 4 – Remake

This was one of my favourite games as a kid, I must have finished the PS2 version at least 30 times and I’ve played it on all its different console versions. When this was announced I was hoping it would live up to the original, with the same story but much fresher. Let me tell you, this is a proper remake.

I played the remakes of 2 and 3. 2 was great, 3 was okay, but 4 is incredible. It’s easily one of, if not the best remake of a game I’ve played . The story is almost identical with some bits moved around and some changes for more logical choices. There’s more of a fear factor than the original, especially the fight in darkness with the blind wolverine guy.

Leon is as badass as he was in the original, part gymnast, part model and part super soldier. This game gives Leon the same over the top melee moves as the original but this time they’re even more mental. From the suplex move from the original to deflecting axes mid air, this game does a great job of making you feel superhuman. Ashley is actually less annoying than in the original, they do a really good job of transforming her from damsel in distress to a useful team mate with the random knowledge to operate a crane with a wrecking ball.

Some bits of the game are drastically changed. You still get the epic village fight that really defined the tone in the original and does the same in this. The village lake section almost feels open world as you can travel to 6 different places from the lake including a place you’ve been to before but now have the keys to plunder it fully. The castle seems to have had the biggest overhaul, rooms have all been moved around to a different order that what I remember from the original. This is good cause it keeps you on your toes, there were points where I thought I knew what was coming and I was correct, and others where I thought I was about to go through to the iconic maze section only to be hit with an entirely new rampart section before it.

The RE4 remake actually feels like it’s dipping its parasite filled trotters into an RPG. It’s obviously still a linear action fulled epic, but there are sections like the lake that almost feel open world with the various side sections you can visit as well as returning to old areas with the ability to explore them further. The addition of merchant quests are so good, there’s now a list of side quests you can complete for spinels that are used to purchase many many goodies, like the punisher or Matilda handguns to gunpowder for crafting or even tokens for the new keyring rewards. These new key-rings replace the models you get from playing the shooting range mini-game. So instead of little models that were previously just nice to look at, we now get these key rings that are also nice to look at, but come with bonus multipliers (very RPG) like extra ammo crafting and more heath recovered with snakes.

Gameplay is great, nice slick controls, knife parrying is mega OP, but it fits with the style of RE4. Being able to parry the chainsaw guy with a kitchen knife is comical but being chainsawed in half if you’re facing the wrong way is appropriately brutal as you’d expect. The quick time events have gone, like the boulder run and Krausers knife fight. I’m in two minds about this, on one hand I enjoyed them in the original but the knife fight in the remake feels like a boss fight now instead so I suppose I’m happy with it.

The QTE events aside, this game stays true to the combat and chaos of the original. Boss fights are much improved with the exception of the U3 boss fight being cut. I do understand as it’s kind of random in the story but it was fun so I do miss it slightly. Regeneradors can run now which is just terrifying, these were the worst enemy for me, mainly due to my very poor sniper skills. These flabby blobs of pain and nightmare fuel do really heighten the horror aspect though which as I said is a big improvement in this game. Not much else terrifies you more than when you think you’ve killed one of these flobby bastards, only to see it rebuild itself with the addition of shards of metal, turning itself into a Bruce Dickinson-less iron maiden.

This game is an easy 10/10 for me. Some Real Fuckin’ Tasty gaming . That much so I finished the game and then preceded to start a second play-through immediately.
I intend to platinum this game although it looks horrendous to do, but I’m willing to replay this many times.

Reviewed by MoonHead

Released 23rd March 2023, Sony Playstation 5

Hogwarts Legacy

Considering this came out a couple months back and I’ve had it since day 1, it’s taken me a mighty long while to complete. This is no bad thing, mind. This game is based on the not so known series that is Harry Potter. Only this time taking place in the 1800’s, you’d expect that the game would only take certain queues from the book and film series. It leans fairly heavily into it though so it’s pretty much what you’d expect. Again this isn’t a bad thing.

First thing I have to mention is Hogwarts itself. Honestly not only does it look incredible, the design and functionality of it is truly remarkable. From all the hidden rooms, moving pictures, ghosts flying around to students casting spells as you go past them. The moving staircase, or the snake that magics the door to the Slytherin common room and disappears as you walk away, all the way to the talking goblins and sets of armour. The castle is littered with tiny details that really build a sense of a living breathing school of magic. As the game progresses so does the season within the game itself, so Hogwarts is decorated differently from Halloween to Christmas. Even the floating candles in the great hall differ. This also changes Hogsmeade’s appearance as well as the terrain of the world that lays out of the walls of Hogwarts. With Hogsmeade being the next big area and contains most of the shops you will use to buy brooms, broom upgrades, different equipment benches for the room of requirement, or bits and bobs for the areas where you can look after and breed the fantasy animals of the magical world, kinda like fantastic beasts.

The tedious lock picking mini game.

The next big thing I should talk about is the magic itself, having 27 different spells you can learn, with some being passive like Alohomora. With most being combat focused and learning the three unforgivable spells. For the most part you’ll only use some spells outside of combat, such as duel challenges or for puzzles. Which is a shame as you’d like a bit more functionality from some of them. Oddly you learn up to level three for Alohomora as this acts as the lock pick mini game. I’d rather it just auto unlocked stuff though, it gets a bit tedious sometimes unlocking a door to unlock a chest or another door for some usual lower stat bit of clothing. Plus the lack of a morality system makes for no reason to not crucio the ever loving shit out of everyone and then hit them with Avada kedavra. As with two of the upgrades you get means the curse spreads to other enemies and then you can one shot all the poor afflicted in one go. You can’t do this till late game though which is a shame, as by the time you get to do this you’ve only a few main missions left and have probably completed or close to finishing the main side quest stories. The combat is pretty decent, standard spell casting hot keys for your special higher damage moves, you can dodge, or upgraded apparate out the way, and use protego which can be used to stupefy enemies briefly. Mostly the upgrades you get are a bit wank, some aren’t really worthwhile or others just don’t do much. With your damage and defence coming from the rating attached to your clothes. They can be upgrade slightly via the loom in the room of requirement and you can attach a charm trait per each piece. At no point do you learn an auto cast so if you just hold down the trigger for it which would make life so much easer, especially with trolls, which just sponge standard attacks. They really missed the mark by not allowing your wand to be a semi or full automatic.

Your character inventory to change equipped clothes.

The world is filled with mini villages to explore, all the same as Hogwarts. Filled with hidden field pages to find, chest, loot bags. More specific collectibles such as collection chests and everyone’s favourites the demiguises. If you want to go for a more thorough play through there are 96 merlin trials which blow ass. Honestly they are tedious as fuck. I’d have much preferred like 15/20 harder puzzles then the shitty 96 you get. Honestly one of my only flaw with the whole game. You can also find; highland field pages though as well, along with popping balloons on your broom, landing pads, bandit camps, animal dens, ancient magic hotspots, mini dungeons which reward you with some new clothing items, and a few other smaller things to find that off the top of my head I can’t remember. There’s enough to keep you occupied for a good few extra hours if you choose to mop up the trophy list. There are three flying challenges, and five bigger dungeons to explore most are locked behind the side quest stories though. Flying in the open world is dandy, the race challenges on the other hand though, pure dogshit. They aren’t that hard to do as long as you’ve upgraded your broom and hit most of the speed bubbles, but it could be a it more loose in the turns. Overall your most fun in exploration will come with Hogwarts itself and the three hidden secrets you can find.

Amongst the main story and the three main quests, which you should definitely do Sebastian’s as soon as they are available as these give you the three unforgivable curses. There are 57 side quests in total to do. So not as grand as other rpg’s out there but enough to tide you over, and for the most part they aren’t all the same. They all help build the wizarding world, and introduce to varying aspects of the game. You have assignments early in the main story these are what unlock your new spells.

Just like duelling the snakey boy Voldemort in the films.

As well as having many spells in your arsenal, you also have potions and varying attack plants. Which honestly I barely used, not because they aren’t of use it’s just that it’s normally easier just to blast the shit out of all your enemies. You do have the option of stealth, but this is definitely a mechanic that needs work. Even with the upgrade to be harder to be seen, you are almost immediately seen by an enemy. So going in all gung-ho is a far better choice. There isn’t too many enemy types, so getting used to how they will attack isn’t too hard. Other then formidable foes, which are just named villains with more health and can usual be eviscerated with your special ancient magic move. Which is gage that fills up during battle, and then can be used to annihilate a poor unsuspecting goblin or spider.

The story isn’t great to be honest, it starts off intriguing then it just meanders and doesn’t build up with the big bad in Ranrok being a fairly non involved bad guy and doesn’t amount to much. With the final boss fight being fairly disappointing. If at any point of the game where the use of magic or quick time events could be used to enhance a mission of fight, this was it and it missed the mark. The game is far better when you are wondering around, or doing quests for better written side characters. I’m currently just under the 40 hour mark and have done pretty much everything, just mopping up collecting everything, and then doing the beginning part of the game again three more times so I can get the platinum. So it’s not the longest game going, and once you have done everything there really isn’t much re-playability outside of going through it all again. Which is a shame. As inviting as the castle itself is, overall the game doesn’t come off as a Borderlands, Elder Scroll, Fallout or Witcher type of game. Where you have all these different builds, or new game plus to return for another round.

My expert combat skills on full show.

Overall I’d rate this game a very high, 8/10, Highly Tasty.

The wank Merlin trials, statue you get upon completing it

For a first entry in a new triple A game, it’s a very strong start. The game world is fantastic and this is exemplified in Hogwarts itself, all worthwhile to explore. Combat works well but is lacking finesse, along with weak upgrades from the skill trees. There could be a few more enemies for variety, and a slightly better or at least in-depth upgrade system. I’d argue even having quests not always ending in caves or crypts just to build the world up a bit. At the moment it seems unlikely but this game is ripe for DLC, even just a new game + just to breath a smidge more life into the game. Hopefully in the inevitable sequel the game hasn’t pigeonholed itself to just Hogwarts and its surrounding areas, as it will definitely need to go further a field to not make the game stale from the get go.

Released 7th February 2023, Sony Playstation 5

Jurassic World Evolution 2

I played the first Jurassic World game and while I didn’t platinum that due to the annoying database trophy, I did enjoy it and I’m a big fan of operation genesis on the PS2. So it makes sense that I picked up this game to play and expected to enjoy it, and that I did.

First things first, let’s talk about the campaign in this game. It’s very short, 5 missions that can be done in less than 3 hours and they’re not incredible by any stretch of the imagination. It’s a rinse and repeat of the same, catch this dinosaur, put it in an enclosure, make it happy. This isn’t anything special but it’s more used like a tutorial and gets you used to the new scientist system as well as keeping your eye out for wild dinos in the challenges and knowing what to do with them.

Then we move on the real meaty balls of the game. The chaos theory mode is very, very good and very, very fun. This mode lets you play through the films and make it ‘work’ this time. It kicks off with Jurassic park, slapping you onto Isla Nublar and letting you recreate the park that started it all. This seems to follow the film as close as reasonable but instead when the shit hits the fan, you fix it before that lawyer guy gets eaten with his pants down. Why he decided to hide from a T-Rex and then rip his pants off I’ll never know.

I absolutely loved this part of the game, seeing the little Easter eggs like what happened to the Spinosaur from JP3 and the planned Jurassic park San Diego is great. The missions are a fair length, some are only an hour, Jurassic World took me about 8 (possible due to being terrible). All in all this section was around 18 hours for me so it’s a fair part of the game.

Sandbox mode is better too. You can have ‘square maps’ which are huge so you can make proper Jurassic World sized parks and fill it with all these new dinosaurs. The Mosasaur is as great as in the film with the iconic shark grab out the water, and all the new sea dino’s are good although I do think we need a few more with more options to decorate the lagoons. Flying dinos are great too though, there aren’t too many of them. You can however decorate their aviaries and their habitation requirements are better than the lagoon creatures, which from what I can tell just require water.

Now, this is where the game kicks into high gear. The challenges. I’m currently on the last challenge and these take some time. Around 7 hours per challenge and with 5 this is about 35 hours of game time. That being said I am trying to do them on Jurassic difficulty for that sweet sweet platinum. These are fun though, while being very challenging with its absurd staffing cost and a storm every 2 seconds.

I’m very impressed with this game. Much better than the first one. Not sure what they could really do for the next game in terms of campaigns, I think hybrid splicing is going to be essential as that’s the only thing id say this game really lacks. Things like more dinos and decorations are a natural addition to a sequel.

I’d give this game 9/10 Pure Tasty Gaming. It’s banging and with some hybrids, more sea and sky boys with a similar chaos theory system the next game will be an easy 10.

Reviewed by MoonHead

Released November 9th 2021, Sony Playstation 5.

Borderlands 2 Ps Vita – Quick Take Review

This’ll be just a quick review, due to the lack of me being able to get footage off my Vita and the fact I imagine most of you would have already played one of the Borderlands games in some way or another and if you haven’t, you are truly missing out.

Borderland is one of the best game series going and 2 sits firmly as one of my all time favourites. Easily in my top 5. I have completed 2 on Xbox 360, PS3/PS4, and started 2 play throughs on the Vita over the years. I must’ve completed the game easily 7 times if not more since it originally dropped. It never gets old. Having started the game up and lost all my previous save data somehow, I chose to just start again. Picking zero for this run, opting for a sniper build, which I have yet to do. If nothing else this game provides high variety in play styles.

With this handheld version, it’s basically the same. If you’ve played the full console version which ever version it may be not much has changed. This is a real positive though. The graphics are all but the same, just slightly down graded. It doesn’t make too much of a difference though. Textures aren’t as crisp and the rendering isn’t obviously as good. This should be expected though considering the lower hardware capabilities. The game plays perfectly fine though, well for the most part. It will semi-frequently lag a bit and get a bit jolty. Overall doesn’t effect the overall shoot outs, which is the main part of the game. The gun fighting and loot, shooting is still just as great as it ever was here.

This particular version comes with pretty much all the DLC, minus Tiny Tina’s Assault on Dragon Keep. Which is a shame as it’s by far the best DLC. Even spawning a spin off title which I have yet to play, just another game in my ever expanding backlog. Having the other 3 main DLC’s to play though is worth while still. Adding extra hours of play and new legendary weapons, boss fights and a slightly higher level cap.

This version makes use of the Vita’s touch pad and touch screen, integrating it into the main aspects of combat. Used for running, melee attacks, throwing grenades and activating each individuals special ability. You can use the console itself to move when zoomed in, I personally find it harder to use activated then not, as you’ll constantly move whilst trying to aim with the joystick. You can if you’re butterfingered like me, though accidentally and constantly launch grenades at the floor in front of you, and end up blowing myself to shit.

Ultimately this version is a slightly downgraded graphically version of the already 10/10 classic. It doesn’t bring anything new to the table really. Just having the extra features that come along with the Vita itself. You get all the same guns, missions and trophy listing that can be shared with the PS3 list if you have already played it. It’s still just as much fun as it ever was and handsome jack is still one of the best villains in gaming.

I’d give this a 10/10 real fuckin’ Tasty. Having one of the best games of the 7^th generation console cycle, with barely any downgrades, and with added portability. Even if you can get them on the Switch now as well, I’d imagine that is worth your time just as much as well.

Released 6th May 2014, Sony Ps vita